


don't want to see you fall too far away

by VolxdoSioda



Series: Whumptober 2018 (Complete) [21]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Day 21 - Harsh Climate, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Recovery, Whumptober, insolation, post WoR
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 10:08:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16406405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VolxdoSioda/pseuds/VolxdoSioda
Summary: Cor takes Noctis up into the mountains to give him room to breathe. There, hidden away in the depths of a blizzard, he lays some truths down for Noctis to pick up when he's ready.Namely, grief takes many forms, and that means being kind to yourself.





	don't want to see you fall too far away

"Shiva's giant frozen tits,  _why?!"_ Noctis yells, dancing in place in a harried effort to remain warm as the blizzard kicks up yet again, blowing sleet and slush towards his face with renewed vigor. It probably looks utterly ridiculous, given how much clothing he's wearing - kind of like a giant bear doing a little jig. But he doesn't care. He's cold, bits of him are threatening to fall off, and  _it's cold._

Somewhere ahead of him, he barely makes out Cor's snort. "Language, Highness," his voice says, amusement coloring his tone.  "Cursing Shiva isn't going to make it any better."

Might just make it worse, he doesn't say. But Noctis knows - the Gods are fickle creatures. And Shiva has done her fill of helping him along his journey. He's survived putting Ardyn down and the sword of the Father through his chest, and now all that's left is living.

That's the hard part.

"With all due respect, Marshall," he hollars back. "I have spent most of my life in very terrible situations. But this takes the cake. So do me a solid, and let me vent my rage by screaming. It's literally all I have left at this point."

"As you say, Highness. But I suggest we keep moving - if you think it's bad now, it's far worse after dark."

"Oh that's just fantast-- oh for fuck's  _sake!"_ Noctis bellows as an especially harsh gust of air nearly knocks him off the mountain. Cor grabs him by his wrist, and hauls him towards him, tucking him beneath an arm in solidarity.

"March," he orders grimly. Noctis cans the complaining, grits his teeth.

And further up the mountain they go.

 

0-0-0-0-0-0-0

 

They find a cave before the last of the light leaves, and Cor gets a roaring fire going that has Noctis sighing with pleasure as he blocks up the entrance of the cave with a tarp and rocks. It's hardly the same as home, but anything to keep them from freezing to death helps. 

"Get those clothes off," Cor orders, already in the process of stripping. "The snow's going to make them soaking wet, if it hasn't already. And I'm not about to have you catch hypothermia."

"Yeah, yeah," Noctis grunts, pulling the last rock into place and standing back to dust his hands off. The wind howls outside, furious at having been kept out, but he ignores it and turns to follow Cor's orders, laying his wet clothes out on the other side of the flames to dry. Cor already has himself wrapped in a thick insulated blanket, and offers one to Noctis as he finishes stripping. 

"I ever tell you how much I love you, Cor?"

His pseudo-uncle snorts. "Now  _there's_ something I've heard a few times in my travels. Mainly from the rookies who don't know how to save their own asses. You trying to tell me something, Noctis?"

"Hey!"

But the gentle ribbing helps, especially while waiting for their meal to cook. Noctis is only too happy Ignis had so much spare meat left over from the pot roast he made the other night. His stomach will also appreciate it, once it's cooked and ready to be eaten.

Across the fire, Cor watches him with a too-knowing gaze. "How are you holding up, Noctis?" he asks softly, all humor falling by the wayside. 

Noctis feels his throat squeeze uncomfortably, and ducks his head to bury his face in the blanket. Damn near thirty years old, but as always completely transparent around the man who was just as much his father as Regis was. "I'm telling myself I'm fine. Honestly at this point, it might as well be true."

"Were it only so simple. You know what they say about lies."

"They come back to bite?"

Cor hums, and a hand appears out of the blanket to beckon him closer. "Come here."

Noctis sighs, hating himself for being so needy, but so entirely grateful to Cor for giving him this. The isolation makes it easier to let himself grieve for everything he's lost - he still has so much to be grateful for, so much left to build on, but that doesn't make what he's lost any easier to bear. 

He tucks himself into Cor's side like he did when he was small, and Cor runs fingers through his hair. Like this, Noctis can almost believe they're back at the Citadel, listening to a snowstorm rage outside. He can almost believe his dad is still alive, that Luna is his wife, that everything is okay.

"The trick," Cor says, voice lowering, "Is not to tell yourself lies. Rather, it is to be kind to your heart. Grieve if you must, Noctis. But don't dwell on it. You'll trip over what's in front of you if you're always looking back."

And yeah, he knows. He knows he needs to get himself together so he can be a good king. But some days make it hard. Really hard. Not just because some times he wakes up and doesn't recognize himself in the mirror - a side effect of aging ten years without actually  _aging,_ Ignis told him - but because some days it feels like it was just yesterday that all this happened. Insomnia fell, and his dad died, and they underwent Leviathan's trial. 

Like he's going to wake up, and find out this is all a lie - that Ardyn is still out there, waiting to die, and the Gods still want him to sacrifice himself to bring back the sun. 

His friends have been incredibly patient with him. And he's so happy about that he could cry. Does, sometimes, when nobody's looking. 

"Sorry," Noctis mumbles. "I'll do better."

"Don't do better, Noctis. Do  _correctly._ Trust me, you don't want to wallow in this pain longer than necessary. Let it bleed out on its own time. If some days you need time away from everything, just say so. That's why we're here. To guard and guide you, and shoulder some of the weight if you need it."

He brushes his nose across the top of Noctis head in the closest approximation to a kiss he'll ever get. "Take it one day at a time, little King. The world will be waiting for you when you're ready to face it. And we'll be there, ready to face it with you."

"Thanks, Cor."

"Hm."


End file.
